Papa

by marmaladescreams

I’ve lost a father I have never had. Sure, he’s my dad biologically, but he’s goddammit not a father in my eyes. I’m tired of searching and hoping for a father figure in that man. Finally, after 20 long years I release myself from one of my life’s greatest pains. Oh, freakin’ daddy issues.
“You desperately want acknowledgment from men, because you never received it from your father,” my psychologist says. Makes sense. How cliché. Well, now that I know, I can change it. I can distance from this.

My grandfather died yesterday (my father’s father). I didn’t even know I had a grandfather until a few months ago. Now, I don’t know how to feel. I should feel some sad irony or remorse.